Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
About Literature / Hobbyist Member Rosalind du CoudrayUnited States Group :iconsonicauthors: SonicAuthors
Recent Activity
Deviant for 4 Years
Needs Premium Membership
Statistics 655 Deviations 8,086 Comments 11,110 Pageviews

Newest Deviations

don't like it don't comment!


picture i like! :iconcatlaplz:
story i like! :iconjokerlaplz:

Journal History



       "Evelyn!" Steve ran into her room trying not to trip over anything in the dark.  He nearly knocked the door down after hearing her scream at two in the morning.
       Evelyn had her knees brought up to her chest and her hands on her head, hair knotted around her fingers, and nails digging into her scalp as she was trying to calm herself down, but tears were streaming down her face.
       He sat on her bed beside her and put an arm around her, pulling her into his lap, mainly because she seemed to want to get closer to him.  She started crying into his chest while her arms were draped around him.
       One arm was up towards her head and another around her waist.  He was lightly stroking her hair hoping it helped calm her down.
       She wasn't calming down at all.  He need to know what was wrong if he had any intentions of helping her settle down.
       "Evelyn, you have to tell me what happened," she sniffled as she slowly started to stop crying.  "I can help you if you tell me what happened.  Was it was dream?"  she nodded.  "What happened?"
       She kept her arms around him, but moved her head so that it wasn't buried in his chest.  She sniffled again.  "I-I was over in  Slovakia," she wiped the tears from her eyes as she continued speaking.  "Selmo Mattica was there.  He-he was the one in charge of Hyde at the time, and, scientists were doing stuff to me.  Putting needles in me," she began to shake.  "Lock me in a dark room for a few days.  When I didn't listed to them first I got slapped, when I got whipped on the back," she seemed to jump, remembering the pain.  She has a bunch of scars from it, a few could still reopen.
       "Then-then," she realizes something and holds him closer to her bursting into tears again.
       "You're safe here," he assured her rubbing his hand up and down her back.  "I won't let anyone hurt you, Evelyn, you mean too much to me."
       She tried to stop crying so she could speak.  "Even after all that I've done?" she looked up at him, tear eyed.
       He nodded smiling.  "If you don't want to tell me the rest then you don't have to," any other time he would try to get her to say everything she could, but with how much she was crying he didn't want to force any of it.
       She shook her head and wiped her face once again with her sleeve.  She had made Steve's shirt wet from all the tears.  She shook her head as she dried her face.  "After months, maybe even years of doing that to me, nearly daily, Selmo came over to me one day, and told me that as long as they could do one more test to me, they'd told me I could leave, and it would be like none of it even happened," she sniffled.  "Least to me it never happened, and I did leave, I left everything behind, I was a new person, I wasn't even a person.  I'm-I'm still not a person."
       "Of course you are, Ev!  You're getting your memories back, might be slowly, but hey, you still are," she began to calm down once he softly kissed the top of her head.
       "Steve, can I sleep with you tonight?" she spoke softly, then looking up at him.  She was afraid that her voice would crack again.
       He smiled.  "Of course you can," even if he didn't like her as much as he did, he would have let her sleep with him, he's way to shy to do anything.
       Evelyn got up and made her way into the bathroom to get herself cleaned up from all the crying that she was doing while Steve went back into his room and got comfortable in his bed.
       A few minutes later Evelyn comes in and gets on the empty side of the bed and close to Steve.  She felt safe beside him, she actually trusted him.  Steve put an arm around her, which made her just get closer to him.
       He felt funny.  Warm was one of them, anxious was another.  He couldn't tell if another thing was love or what, but he sure was enjoying this.
       "Thank you, Steve," she sets a hand on his cheek, looking at his bright blue eyes, that were easy to see in the dark room, she even showed off a smile.
       He gave her one back.  "Its no problem, Ev.  I care about you," he moved a piece of her hair out of her face so he was able to see her golden eyes.
       She cuddled in closely to him, wanting to become warm just from his body heat.
       A few days pass and everything seems to be going fine, even if Evelyn won't tell Steve anything.
       He's trying to get her to talk more, assuring her that its fine to talk about anything she wants, and can say more than just directly answering a question, she was sure she had some stories to tell, she's been a secret weapon ever since she was captured that day.
       "Evelyn," Steve says one morning.  They're sitting across from one another while eating breakfast.  He had toast and eggs, while she had dry cereal.  She looked up at him after taking in a spoonful of the cheerios.  "Do you remember how you were captured?"
       She shook her head.  "No, I don't," pause.  "Should I?" she was wearing a long sleeved shirt with a pair of Steve's sweat pants, which were too big on her, but she liked them that way.
       "Well would you like to know?" He was wearing a simple t-shirt and a pair of plaid pajama pants.
       She paused for a moment, thinking it over, wondering if she could remember it all.  He's been trying to help hr remember a few things, somethings she remembered right away, others he had to tell the story, some parts in full detail for her to understand fully.  This she couldn't remember at all.  "I guess it wouldn't hurt to know," she gave a small smile.
       It wasn't exactly a fun nor happy story, but she should know, it could help her with remembering a few other things.  "We thought the base belonged to HYDRA, but it was Hyde, a group that we never heard about until that moment.  They captured the troops that were sent there, we went on a different mission at the time.  Once we got there you had the plan of me dressing up as a guard and me taking you in a prisoner, and it worked.  You were put with everyone else, and a while later I came in and got everyone out.  Everyone started to make their way towards the entrance to get out, I didn't see you anywhere, but I thought you were just lost in the crowd even if we were always at each other's side.  We later found out that you went into the building, and you tried blowing it up with the grenades that we found.  You never made it out.  Least that's what we all thought."
       He gave her a moment to take that all in.  She had her hands on her lap, looking down into her cereal.  Steve couldn't tell if she was remembering what happened or if she was finding it hard to believe that she had gotten captured by them.
       "Evelyn?  Are you okay?" he reaches out and puts his hand on her shoulder, which snaps her out of the trance.
       She jerks.  "Oh, um, yeah, uh.  Yeah Steve, I'm fine, just a bit to think about.  I think I remember that.  I-I took a few grenades that you found, and went back inside, hoping to destroy most of the base, but guards were coming once I threw the first one.  I took down a few of the guards, about five more came, all having guns and pointing at me, I knew I couldn't take them down, so I threw the last grenade that I had and ran.  Th-the force took me down, burned me pretty badly," she bit her lip, she can remember that scene all too clearly now.  "Then I woke up somewhere, and-and, I had a knife stabbed though my right hand, nearly passed out from blood loss, or did I?  Some nurse gave me something, and having nearly no blood didn't help."
       Her voice began to crack towards the end.  Steve got up and sat beside her and hugged her.
       "Evelyn, its wonderful that you're remembering, amazing actually, just keep talking and more should come back to you," he moved her messy hair out of her face.
       She shakes her head.  "I don't want to talk about it," she bites her lips and hangs her head hair covering her face.
       He let out a sigh. "Please Evelyn. It'll help, trust me. You want to know now about yourself don't you?" she slightly nods and Steve's asks her to tell him what happened.
       She had started to shed a few tears when she was telling Steve in full detail what happened after she was captured.  She wasn't sure where these memories were coming from, which then made her cry more, it made her question who she really was, she didn't have a clue at all.
       The two moved over to the couch to get more comfortable.  She leaned against him wiping tears from her face with the sleeves of the shirt, while he had an arm around her to comfort her, to make her feel safe.
       "Steve," she said softly, she was afraid that her voice would crack.  "Who am I really?  I'm not really a killer, am I?"
       "Well, you weren't a killer in the way that you are saying it.  You were always a bit violent, but also fearless, which was good, but you were also really stubborn, and didn't listen to orders very well, nearly got our team caught and killed a few times, but you always had a reason behind it, and nine out of ten times your plan worked, but besides that, you were really sweet, as long as you liked the other anyway.  You were a bit of a show off, but in a good way, you always wanted to show the men on the base that just because you're a girl that it doesn't mean you can't do the same thing as them.  I loved having you apart of my team."
       Steve smiled down at her even if she wasn't in view for her to see him.  He thought that this would be a good opportunity to tell her how he feels about her, but even if he had to explain all of this he still wasn't sure how, and it also seemed like he was taking advantage of it.
       "Not sure if I seem like a nice person or not," she said softly.  He was fiddling with the sleeves on her arms, they were a bit long on her so she kept her hands covered, she just felt safer somehow.  She's never felt like this.  She felt weak, and she hated it, she had a bit of a death wish as well.  She didn't want to be back at Hyde, bit she felt like that's where she belongs, she felt safe there, nothing could go wrong there, this is the longest she's been out of the facility.
       "You were a nice person, and I'm sure that person is still in you," he was nervous, he really wanted to tell her about his feelings, he may not get another chance.  "Can I tell you something that I've been wanting to tell you since the 40's?"
       "Hey, even if you told me back then, its not like I remember, so say whatever you wish."
       Steve let out a deep breath, he wanted to pull her closer to him.  "I-I. . . I love you."
       Steve had an extra room in his apartment that he set up for her once they got back.  They moved things around and cleaned up in there for nearly an hour.
       Evelyn did anything unless if Steve said something to her directly.  He knew that that was going to have to be fixed.  He laid down on the bed once they were done, besides putting a few of the cleaning items away.  She stood in the middle of the room and looked around at their work.  Steve gave her a look which must have made her decide to sit down.
       "Evelyn, you know you can talk.  They aren't going to hurt you any longer," he sets his hands on his stomach and turns his head to look at her.
       She sits sideways on the foot of the bed with a leg up on the mattress.  She didn't know what to say.  For as long as she could remember-which wasn't long-she'd listen and automatically do what they had trained her to do.  She opens her mouth but nothing comes out until a few seconds later.  "I know.  It's just what I'm use to," she looked at him.
       He reached a hand out and felt the suit that she was wearing by touching her arm.  "Should probably get you some real clothes," She somewhat flinched from him touching her.  He signed and propped himself up on his elbows.  "What is the last thing you remember?"
       She tries thinking.  "Waking up in a lab an being told to find you," her long, black painted nails dig though the suit and into her arm.  Steve opened his mouth to say something until she spoke again.  "Wait," she shut her eyes digging her nails deeper.  "No, that's not it.  It's . . . it's," a bunch of images came though her head, they were in no sort of order.
       She only snapped out of it when Steve put a hand on her shoulder, and tried getting her nails out of her arm.  He seemed to be in a panic.  She took her hand off her arm and noticed she was bleeding.
       "Don't stress it, Evelyn," she finally caught up to her breath once Steve took his hand off her.  "Are you going to be okay?" she nodded her head, staring blankly into space.  "Then tell me that you will be."
       She tilted her head down.  "I'll be okay," she said softly.  She knew that she wasn't going to fall asleep, being in a bed like this was going to be strange for her, too strange to even fall asleep.  She felt Steve examine her arm, it wasn't bleeding bad, but enough for it to bleed for a while.  She was use to people looking at her wounds, so she thought nothing of it, it was the only that was normal to her right now.
       "Would you like for me to help you clean this?"
       She shook her head, and just as Steve was about to tell her to talk again she began.  "No, I can clean it myself," she moved her arm back to her arm to cover the holes in her arm.  "You . . . you should go get some sleep."
      "Good night, Evelyn," she smiled and got up from the bed they both prepared.  "See you in the morning."
       Before he closed the door as he walked out he looked back at her and noticed that she was still in the same position, back towards the door, right hand on her left arm, and one leg up on the bed with her head down.  He closed the door and went to his room.
       Evelyn wasn't sure if she wanted to be there for not, but she knew if she left, they'd just be after her again, maybe once she learned more she'd be able to leave, know more about the outside world.
       She laid down on her back with her hands on her stomach and looking up at the ceiling.  The mattress was a lot softer than what she was use to, it was a bit uncomfortable for her, though to anyone else they'd love it.  
       She eventually did fall asleep, it was a very light sleep however, she'd hear something outside and wake up thinking someone was in the room.
       Steve was finishing up a bit of the blood that was on the white floor while Sharon was looking at the metal device that was in Evelyn's neck.  It was a bit bloody from being yanked out.  Evelyn was in the bathroom getting a shower.  They told her that they'd have one of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s body suits for her when she was done, which Sharon went and got and set in the bathroom.
       Evelyn was in the shower for nearly a half hour.  Lost in her thoughts.  The only reason why she wasn't in there longer was because Steve asked her if she was doing okay in there.  She said she was fine, only because she didn't know how to express how she was truly feeling.  It took her a few minutes before she came out of the bathroom.  She had her wet blonde and blue hair pulled up into a pony tail so that the water wouldn't soak the back of the body suit, which seemed skin tight on her.
       Steve went over to her to look at the back of her neck.  She moved away and he sighed.  "Evelyn, I'm just going to properly clean it, and then bandage it so it won't bleed out.  You can sit down on the bed if you'd like."
       She nodded, not saying anything, keeping her mouth shut and sat on the bed.  She sat facing the foot of the bed one leg up on the bed, the other firmly on the ground.  Steve slowly down down behind her, not wanting to alarm her.  He felt like he was treating her like an animal, he didn't want this, he practically had to order for her to do something.
       Steve was abruptly interrupted while starting to bandage her neck.  His head shot up hearing his named get called at the door.  Evelyn payed no attention to it since it wasn't directed towards her, even if it was sudden, she had gotten use to that.
       "Rogers!  What in the hell do you think you're doing?" Fury called walking into the room.  Steve opened his mouth to talk, but as usual Fury went first.  "I thought you were ordered to stay in a different room, on a different floor, while we got someone to get her," he nodded at Evelyn.
       "I was informed that I was allowed to leave as long as Sharon was with me, which she was.  I have no control over Evelyn, if she didn't want to be found, she wouldn't have been, but evidently she wanted to be," Steve talked back.
       Fury was actually surprised about the way Steve talked back, and what he said was true.  "You intentionally went after her, which is the opposite of what you were told to do, I thought you soldiers listened."
       "That's why I always came up with my own plans," he tilts his head at Evelyn.  "She was the one that never listened."
       "Looks like the tables have turned."
       Steve got up once he finished up with her.  "I wasn't letting you send people out there to hunt her down.  She would only come out if I was there, and I wasn't taking the risk of them harming her."
       Evelyn just sat there, as if they weren't going back and forth about her.  Sharon sat beside her, which she was surprised about, since within the past hour she's hit her, and nearly killed her from being in this room.
       ". . . if I have to stay here, and I'm not allowed to see her, then I'm just taking her to my apartment with me," Evelyn only heard the ending of Steve's sentence and looked up at him.
       He seemed to know the most about her, it may not have been a horrible idea, then again something can always go wrong.

       Steve and Fury spent a few hours arguing outside of the room.  Sharon had things to tend to so Evelyn was in there by herself, barely able to hear the words coming from the two men, only when they were really raising their voices.  Her thoughts were still in Slovakian, to her it was her first language.  She did know English, but didn't like using it, but knew it was the only thing that they would understand.  She wanted to find a way out of the room, but there was nothing.  The room was under ground do no windows, and there wasn't a vent at all to circulate air.   The door automatically locks once you close it, and it can only be opened from the outside.
       She stood up off the bed and went into the bathroom to her clothes, she went though the pockets to see if anything was in there.  She found a small radio.  She doubted that it worked this far under ground, but she turned it on anyway and became talking into it.  Only static, with a very slight voice in the background.  It was too difficult to make out however.  She turned it off and stuck it in her blue belt, which she attached around her waist.  It never felt right to not have the belt on.
       Weapons.  There has to be something in there.  She always carried quite a few weapons, and no one searched her.  In her pants pocket she found a knife.  Perfect.  She kept the knife against her arm, the sleeves were too tight to hide it.  She hoped they wouldn't notice.  She walked out of the bathroom walked back over to the bed.  Half was there the door opened and she looked over at the two men walking in.  Fury stayed by the door, propping it open.
       Steve walked over to her.  "Instead of staying here, I'm bringing you to my apartment.  Are you fine with that?" Evelyn nodded her head.  Steve told her to follow him, and started to walk out of the room.
       As Evenly turned, Fury noticed the lights hit the blade of the knife and he pulled out his gun, pointing it at her.  "Drop the knife, Eberle," Steve also said something to Fury until he told her to drop the knife.
       Evelyn held the knife backwards, the blade coming out where her pinky is, easier to get a lethal wound that way, and stood in a position where she was getting ready to move.  Fury repeated himself, but of course she didn't listen.  Even if he did shoot her, she could deflect it with the knife, and hope it works.  Steve spoke up telling her to put the knife down, but he seemed kinder about it, it was something about his voice that made it seem like he was asking something totally different.  She felt as if she should listen to him, so she did.
       Slowly she stood up straight and dropped the knife.  Steve gave her a nod and Fury lowered his gun and put it back in the holster on his belt.  Steve started to walk out again and she followed.  Fury watched her closely, not trusting her at all.
first day of school and I nearly punched someone and now I have a splitting headache.
And the school messed up nearly EVERYONE'S schedule. well actually, It was only 11th grade(mainly 11th grade) because we have a stupid guidance counselor.
Some people didn't have a schedule, and some people didn't even have a homeroom to go to.
They gave me two of the same class and a Study Hall(which my school doesn't have) and when I went to say that I needed it fixed they kicked me and 3-4 other people out, and so I'm just not caring anymore, its the same teacher, so he'll have to say something to guidance.
I don't fucking care, I'm not tracking them down to change my schedule, its not a huge issue, so I'm not going to complain.
Today could have gone way better though
  • Mood: Irritated
  • Listening to: Cake To Bake
  • Reading: what i'm typing right now


nigth-the-hedgehog's Profile Picture
Rosalind du Coudray
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
i'm not the best at drawling so don't post any bad comments. i don't do requests only because my drawings are shitty no matter what others say i think there really bad, though if you draw something i will color it. i prefer to color then drawing. i may be cold hearted but my soft side shows when i see a cute kittie. and if you think im crazy your right, i'm crazy enough to be the Jokers child
My Heart belongs to the men at Arkham Asylum.
Current Residence: pittsburgh pa.
Favourite genre of music: rock, emo, screamo, nightcore, j/k-pop
MP3 player of choice: sansa
Favorite cartoon character: Batman and Joker
Personal Quote: yaaaa........i don't care

Flag Counter
I support the undead. by Kitsune-NotunaiWe're all mad here... -Stamp- by cos1163I'm not evil - Stamp by metal-martyUNF by 1FoxyladyBlood stamp by asuminakuki14I like you, i'll.. by esoog-adnamaI'm A Demon Stamp by JetProwerTheFoxMe Stamp by JetProwerTheFoxDick Figures: Flame War Stamp by GeekyKitten64Mephiles Stamp by Miha85Good Guys Stamp by WolvenFlamesShadow Stamp by Abbu1STAMPSwake up STAMP by peterdzign.: Stamps OC :. by SeppyoTOMBOY by NatureNeverHurriesMy type of girl - stamp by OfficiallyAbiRandom Stamp by sam-ely-emberDispleased Shadow Stamp by Code-EIf you poke me stamp by OinaruKisekiTomboyish Stamp by xSweetSlayerxBullet for my valentine by old-mc-donaldAvenged sevenfold by old-mc-donaldIron Maiden Metal Stamp 1 by dA--bogeymanAtheist-Coexist Stamp by MonishiiLove to RP stamp by Horse-Girl-101i love gore-blood stamp by MayBunnielooking into collections stamp by sixthkidfromthestarzShadow's Still Sexier -STAMP- by xXFireFoxGirlXxim insane and proud stamp by SilverSheCat.:I Love Psychos:. Stamp by YinYangLammyWarriors Stamp by GoldencloudSpecial Stamp by Kezzi-RoseShy stamp by Edhelwen-dmKnow Me Better Stamp by mylastelStamp - Memory by KanaScottPokerap 1st verse Stamp by SquirtleStampsXD Stamp by MimiMarieTTomboy Stamp by JiiHakuFAIL As A Girl Stamp by JiiHakuPokemon Fo' Life Stamp by SweetDukeCaramelldansen Maniac Stamp by HeruNoTenchiOriginal Pokemon FTW Stamp by DbzbabeNo Cheating Stamp by BrandiMuffinLucario Love Stamp by SquirtleStamps:thumb127687395:Sonic and Mario Stamp by sonicinterface:iconshadowsmile-stamp1::iconshadowsmile-stamp2:If Pokemon Were Real Stamp by MorRokkoScourge Stamp by LoveAnimeAndCartoonsI Cried When Bluestar...Stamp by SweetSuicune2000:thumb263081785:10,000 Pageview Prize by WarriorCatsFanClubThank You... by jennyleighInteract Stamp + Plz by UnicornRealitySonic X by SuperheroGeek13Game Boy Stamp by Kezzi-RoseVampire Stamp by indigobunnyArtists' Alliance Stamp by bardicsidhe

AdCast - Ads from the Community


Add a Comment:
RockIntensse Featured By Owner Sep 2, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Thanks for the faves ; *** Have a nice day!
nigth-the-hedgehog Featured By Owner Sep 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
no problem ^-^
and you too!
RockIntensse Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Thanks :)
elinkalo Featured By Owner Aug 16, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Hi, very thank you for fav! I appreciate it :3 :) you can visit my gallery:… Have a nice day! Elia
nigth-the-hedgehog Featured By Owner Aug 16, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
no problem ^-^ and thank you for the fave as well x3
and thanks, you have a nice day as well
Add a Comment: